Friday, July 04, 2008

Bottled Water for Dogs

I was unavoidably in the local shopping mall recently. Believe me, it isn't an experience I usually enjoy (especially since the branch of Borders there closed down). Whilst I was in there I saw something astonishing - a large display advertising bottled water for dogs.

One of the people paid to market this stuff saw me looking and must have mistaken my amazement for interest because she came over and started talking to me about the product. I couldn't resist it. I stood in the middle of the shopping mall and argued with her.

I know. She probably didn't really have any interest in the product at all. She was just paid a paltry amount to stand in a shopping mall all day and try to sell people bottled water for dogs. But to give her credit, she really did her best to persuade me this was a wonderful product and I should buy it.

She told me that she gave this water to her dog because her previous dog had died of kidney failure. She didn't directly answer my question about whether the vet had told her that the dog's kidney failure was caused by drinking tap water. She did respond to my assertion that dogs will drink out of the toilet bowl by claiming they only do this because tap water is so repellent to them. When I said that the toilet bowl is filled with tap water she changed the subject onto all the nasty chlorine in mains water. So I asked her how come this nasty chlorine is OK for humans and not for dogs and she told me humans are "more robust" than dogs. She was getting a bit cross at this point and she began to say "If you..." and I felt sure she was about to say "If you loved your pet you'd want to give them bottled water", but at that very moment our discussion was cut short.

Whilst we had been locked in debate, my kids had been entertaining themselves playing with the fountain which was part of the promotional display. A six-foot replica of the product carton was spewing distinctly chlorine-scented water into a huge dog bowl. A perspex guard surrounded the bowl to prevent small children falling in, and my children had been leaning on this to splash their hands in the water. Just as the dog-water-lady was saying "If you..." the perspex guard broke with a loud "Crack!"

I apologised and offered to pay for the damage. Actually she was gracious about it. But I was forced to beat a hasty retreat.

19 comments:

Mark Lee said...

Great story! :-)

For my part, I drink out of the toilet because when I'm crawling around in the morning, it's simply impossible for me to stand up.

Z said...

I am shocked and appalled. But at the same time, I laughed. It's the way you tell 'em, Mel!

Z said...

Ooh, and actually, we've had dogs all my life and it's only the male dogs who want to drink out of the toilet. They like the added flavour, is all.

Blicky Kitty said...

What will they come up with next? The decadence is appalling. I was just saying that to my dog's therapist the other day.

If the world economy tanks in upcoming years or months we will be able to (gleefully) witness the demise of such frivolity.

Gid said...

This is obvious nonsense.. if they really wanted to create the ideal doggie drinking hole they would've invented the artificial puddle..

Anonymous said...

This is the most hilariously ridiculous thing I've read all day. Thanks!

Robj98168 said...

ROFLMFAO! Binky my yorkie wants to know about this bottled water, he says all the chic dogs are drinking it. And he wants to be chic. It's a puppy fashion statement

Robj98168 said...

and z= we have a female lab- who drinks outta the turlet- my male yorkie and male pug do not (course they cant reach the toilet

Anonymous said...

Do they give you a flavoring packet to make the bottled water taste like it came out of an actual toilet bowl?

Yum!

Unknown said...

Loving it, Mel!

Were the kids rewarded with extra pocket money?

Anonymous said...

My dogs get spring water as a matter of course (our water comes from a spring), but are they content? NO ~ they go outside to drink water from the ducks' bath ~ all muddy & duckified!

It's still killi ~ blogger rejects my password

THROBGOBLINS INTERNATIONAL. said...

Well, well well. Such marketing acumen, these people. Such imagination. Such determination.

We're all going to die.

Anonymous said...

The usual reason given for the toilet thing is that water fresh from the tap has more chlorine in - it evaporates off the longer the water stands. This is why it's recommended to let tap water stand before putting it in your aquarium, for instance.

Of course this logic falls down when you realise that if you refresh your dog's water a couple of times a day, the water in your toilet probably has more chlorine in than your dog's bowl does. Especially if you're one of those chlorine bleach types.

Yodood said...

Bottled water is tap water!?! WTF

Anonymous said...

Oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. I do hope your children were suitably rewarded, Mel, and that you didn't have to pay for the damage to the perspex wotsit.
But I say, what a wonderful way to make money. Take a product that everyone uses anyway, give it a new name, put it in really ridiculous packaging - and sell it to the gullible rich for oodles and oodles of lovely crisp fivers.
Oxygen for fish, anyone?

Fran

Anonymous said...

Bottled water for dogs is an absolute abomination. Your children’s act of sabotage was the only reasonable course of action. They deserve a medal and that manipulative marketing - agggggggrhhhhhhhhhh

Blicky Kitty said...

As usual you inspired me with your post! Hope Blicky repays the laugh you gave us! :)

http://blickykitty.blogspot.com/2008/07/beware-hypermiling-feline.html

Robj98168 said...

My pug only drinks perrier- he wants to fart with a french accent! Sorry Mel- I couldn't resist

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